I have tamed my ego.

If I tell you that I love you and you don’t accept my love, it’s your loss not mine.

I will walk away and wish you well.

If I apologize and you don’t accept it, I’m free, you’re not.

I will leave it at that and pray that someday you will find it in your heart

to accept an apology sincerely given.

If you win and I lose,

I will rejoice with you, and we can be happy together.

When things don’t go my way,

I give up control to the One who controls every aspect of my life.

His way is always best.

Strive to tame your ego.

After you’ve done all you can,

learn to surrender all outcomes

and know what it feels like to be free and at peace.

Last night, my friend Cris and I, were having a discussion on what it takes to take the ego. How does one know if the ego has been tamed? It’s when you arrive at a point of having confidence without arrogance, and humility without insecurity.

How do you get there?

First of all, it takes a while and a lot of pain and heartbreak to get there. Pain is inevitable on that road, but suffering is optional.

You’ll know you’ve arrived when you’ve learned to accept who you are, what you need and what you’re willing to accept. It happens when you’ve finally learned to love yourself. Cris describes it as finding the light in a murky river. It happens after you’ve been rejected so many times and yet, after each time, you’ve been able to rise again by God’s grace without any desire to harm or retaliate, because you know that God will take care of you.

So you roll with what’s there, believing in your heart that rejection is only God’s way of redirecting you to something, or someone better for you. You mourn the loss or the rejection for a while, because that’s part of the healing, and then you pick yourself up, keep your chin up, and move on to the next chapter with gratitude in your heart.

Leave always with a blessing. It’s not always easy to do that but it’s the most peaceful way, no matter the hurt, no matter the seeming injustice. When you do, trust that all these blessings you leave behind will return to you in the perfect time. Don’t wait for it. Just have faith that all shall be well.

The person who has tamed their ego lives in a state of perpetual grace. You may stumble for a while, but nothing can no longer harm or break you.

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